Comments on: Happy 36th Birthday To My Only Sister http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/ Sex, Life and Introspection Mon, 26 Jul 2010 20:24:46 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Ian Duncan http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-338 Ian Duncan Sat, 19 Dec 2009 19:52:30 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-338 Thanks Skeeter, I really appreciate hearing that from you. Yeah it's true that life can be very challenging at times and some people can be thoughtless and downright cruel to us. But in the end we only have the choice to get away from them, and move on to something or somewhere better. That's what I try to do. It sure beats sticking around getting stressed out of your mind with an endless cycle of abuse. And I still believe that we choose our own families. Just because we were born from someone doesn't mean we're stuck with them no matter what. Sometimes it really does make the most sense to just cut ties with toxic people, because life really can be so much better than living in misery. Thanks Skeeter, I really appreciate hearing that from you. Yeah it’s true that life can be very challenging at times and some people can be thoughtless and downright cruel to us. But in the end we only have the choice to get away from them, and move on to something or somewhere better. That’s what I try to do. It sure beats sticking around getting stressed out of your mind with an endless cycle of abuse. And I still believe that we choose our own families. Just because we were born from someone doesn’t mean we’re stuck with them no matter what. Sometimes it really does make the most sense to just cut ties with toxic people, because life really can be so much better than living in misery.

]]> By: Skeeter Wayne http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-331 Skeeter Wayne Thu, 17 Dec 2009 05:21:39 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-331 Ian, thanks for affirming that it is possible to live through a abusive relationship. I know you have scars, but I think you have done amazingly well, all things considered. Keep up the good work. Ian, thanks for affirming that it is possible to live through a abusive relationship. I know you have scars, but I think you have done amazingly well, all things considered. Keep up the good work.

]]> By: Tom http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-298 Tom Sun, 29 Nov 2009 18:55:58 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-298 Wow, Ian, you're gonna make me cry. Only in the last several years have I really started to bond with my older sis -- through our love of music, but hey, it's a start -- and I care for her now more than I ever had before. Sorry, I don't mean to rub your nose in things, and I can't even begin to fathom the kind of childhood you had, my life seems idyllic by comparison. My advice: do everything you can to try and patch things up with her. Like you said, she's your only sister and you're her only brother, and the bro/sis bond can be a unique one. Reach out to her -- it's never too late. BTW, I just discovered your blog through a friend (I'd seen pics and vids of yours online years ago and wondered just the other day whatever had become of you), and I'm now bookmarking it and visiting it regularly. Big, big hugs! -T Wow, Ian, you’re gonna make me cry. Only in the last several years have I really started to bond with my older sis — through our love of music, but hey, it’s a start — and I care for her now more than I ever had before. Sorry, I don’t mean to rub your nose in things, and I can’t even begin to fathom the kind of childhood you had, my life seems idyllic by comparison. My advice: do everything you can to try and patch things up with her. Like you said, she’s your only sister and you’re her only brother, and the bro/sis bond can be a unique one. Reach out to her — it’s never too late.

BTW, I just discovered your blog through a friend (I’d seen pics and vids of yours online years ago and wondered just the other day whatever had become of you), and I’m now bookmarking it and visiting it regularly.

Big, big hugs!
-T

]]> By: Len http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-293 Len Wed, 18 Nov 2009 13:23:43 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-293 Ian, hope that somehow your sister can learn to deal with the truth. My mom's last words to me were that I was being cut out of the will and that she would see me again to bury me when I dropped dead from AIDS, so I know a little bit about what you are feeling. But I was a lot luckier than you in that my oldest sister knew exactly what was going on and became the only family I have. We all do what we need to in order to survive, and getting away from an abusive situation was what kept you alive... Ian, hope that somehow your sister can learn to deal with the truth. My mom’s last words to me were that I was being cut out of the will and that she would see me again to bury me when I dropped dead from AIDS, so I know a little bit about what you are feeling. But I was a lot luckier than you in that my oldest sister knew exactly what was going on and became the only family I have. We all do what we need to in order to survive, and getting away from an abusive situation was what kept you alive…

]]> By: Alex http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-288 Alex Thu, 12 Nov 2009 04:04:17 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-288 Dear Ian, What a heartwrenching post. Thanks for the courage to share your feelings! You are an incredible man because you're a survivor. You seized the power to take care of yourself. Sorry for the lost possibilities with Sara. Peace, love. Alex Dear Ian,

What a heartwrenching post. Thanks for the courage to share your feelings!

You are an incredible man because you’re a survivor. You seized the power to
take care of yourself. Sorry for the lost possibilities with Sara.

Peace, love.

Alex

]]> By: Ken http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-286 Ken Tue, 10 Nov 2009 22:00:57 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-286 Ian: So sorry to hear you've had to suffer all these years with this. Amazing that children growing up in the same household can have such different views of their upbringing, or that another person can have no "awareness of the other." Denial is a powerful coping mechanism. The important thing is, you have let your sister know what happened to you. She heard you. It may take a long time for her to digest what she's heard and to understand what happened to you as a child and how you've carried inside you it all these years. Some sort of inner peace will come to you as a result of your reaching out as you have done. I wish you much happiness as you struggle to put this behind you. Know that you have friends that will support you and love you for what you are. Time will take care of most of this. Your personal blogs will certainly help in the process. Much love and good wishes, Ken Ian: So sorry to hear you’ve had to suffer all these years with this. Amazing that children growing up in the same household can have such different views of their upbringing, or that another person can have no “awareness of the other.” Denial is a powerful coping mechanism.

The important thing is, you have let your sister know what happened to you. She heard you. It may take a long time for her to digest what she’s heard and to understand what happened to you as a child and how you’ve carried inside you it all these years. Some sort of inner peace will come to you as a result of your reaching out as you have done.

I wish you much happiness as you struggle to put this behind you. Know that you have friends that will support you and love you for what you are. Time will take care of most of this. Your personal blogs will certainly help in the process.

Much love and good wishes,
Ken

]]> By: RandallNYC http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-285 RandallNYC Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:28:58 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-285 You do know it has to be addressed and confronted. The past has a way of lurking in the present. Smooch. I SO wanna see U as Tiny the Clown! You do know it has to be addressed and confronted. The past has a way of lurking in the present. Smooch. I SO wanna see U as Tiny the Clown!

]]> By: Pascal http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-284 Pascal Mon, 09 Nov 2009 10:34:10 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-284 Toi aussi tu es fait fort Ian. Tu as prouvé à travers les années que tu es un "fighter" et que tu n'abandonnes jamais. Tu es un symbol de persévérence et de détermination. Et avec tout ce que tu as vécu, tu mérites d'autant plus d'étre heureux et de récolter le fruit de tes efforts. Lâche pas Ian, on t'aime ! Big Hug ! xoxo Toi aussi tu es fait fort Ian. Tu as prouvé à travers les années que tu es un “fighter” et que tu n’abandonnes jamais. Tu es un symbol de persévérence et de détermination. Et avec tout ce que tu as vécu, tu mérites d’autant plus d’étre heureux et de récolter le fruit de tes efforts. Lâche pas Ian, on t’aime ! Big Hug ! xoxo

]]> By: Ian Duncan http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-282 Ian Duncan Sun, 08 Nov 2009 22:37:23 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-282 Thanks, yes i'm lucky for that. :) Thanks, yes i’m lucky for that. :)

]]> By: RandallNYC http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-281 RandallNYC Sun, 08 Nov 2009 20:49:56 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-281 Wow, Ian, powerful stuff. Glad u have someone, besides Buster, to curl up to. xxoo Wow, Ian, powerful stuff. Glad u have someone, besides Buster, to curl up to. xxoo

]]> By: helio http://ianduncan.com/2009/11/07/happy-36th-birthday-to-my-only-sister/comment-page-1/#comment-280 helio Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:39:38 +0000 http://ianduncan.com/?p=2024#comment-280 voce é muito lindo!! sem palavras!!! voce é muito lindo!! sem palavras!!!

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